Conquering A Big Fear
I’m working on conquering a big fear of mine – It’s called “video”!
Yes…video. Speaking live into a camera, a cell phone…video.
You see, I’m an introvert.
I love to talk with people one-to-one, I always have and I probably always will. Being in big groups is actually quite draining for me and I prefer the company of a few good friends.
But at the same time, I believe in pushing myself forward and challenging myself. I believe in Personal Development.
For some time, I’ve realized that public speaking and video was going to have to be in the cards for me. I was going to have to conquer this big fear.
Of course, I’ve been resisting. And struggling with the resisting. And then resisting some more!
But I’m getting there.
I’ve started with a few easy steps. A thank you page video for a new program I’m creating and a very short Facebook live video. Truthfully the thank you page video was much more difficult! I guess it was because I felt I needed to be “polished and professional”, while in the Facebook live, I felt a bit more relaxed and like I was just speaking with friends.
In any case, I didn’t think either video was very good…but I did it! And that did feel good.
It felt good to make a start, and to start before I was “ready”. Because I don’t think that “ready” ever actually happens.
In my years of working on film sets, I’ve watched countless actors come to set to do a scene, totally not “ready.” The crew sits through take after take of a single sentence (let alone a whole paragraph) before the actor finally gets it. And once it’s done, it’s great. It’s worth the wait and an exceptional performance adds a lot to the film project. But it wasn’t perfect to start…
So my tips today are about how to conquer a big fear, like public speaking.
What to do when you want to do something that really scares you and you don’t feel you’re ready.
1. Start Before You’re Ready
Like my experiences with actors, we’re never really “ready.” And if you’re a beginner, the only way to stop being a beginner is with practise. So you’re going to have to start. Acknowledge that your start probably won’t be very good and accept that. But do it anyway. Practise as much as you can, and just start.
2. Realize that “Fear” isn’t Actually the Enemy
Fear can be one of your greatest allies. Fear is telling you where there is more work to be done, where there is room for improvement. Where there isn’t ‘mastery.’ If you’ve completely mastered something, you wouldn’t feel any fear…but since you are feeling fear, that simply means you’re not a master yet. You’re still a grasshopper. That’s a totally fine place to be, simply continue your practise.
3. Waiting for Fear to Go Away is the Enemy
That moment will never come. If you’re afraid of trying something, or stretching yourself – you must do it, no matter how much fear you actually feel. Because the feeling of fear isn’t going to go away on it’s own, it will only leave when you’ve mastered whatever it is you’re trying to do. So stop thinking about it, and just start doing it. It’s the only way.
4. Practise. Practise. Practise.
Do you have a big fear that you’d like to conquer? Is there something holding you back in business or life, that you just can’t seem to get over?
Let’s chat…I’m here to help.